Forgiveness:Release from the prison of sin

INTRODUCTION

The challenge of forgiving my dad
There was a time when I needed to forgive my father for his inappropriate relationship with my sister that damaged her soul and led to her alcoholism which resulted in her death from liver cancer. For two years I was tortured with the need to forgive him, but I didn’t understand some of the dynamics that I was grappling with subconsciously. I needed help to forgive. It was suggested to me that subconsciously I probably feel that if I forgave my father, I would be betraying my sister (letting my father off the hook) and if I don’t forgive my father I would be betraying God. It helped enormously.

Question:Have you ever been so hurt by someone that you found it difficult to forgive? Did you need help? Did you get help? Discuss.

Forgiveness v Revenge: the world wants revenge, Jesus taught forgiveness.
Matt. 18:21-22 (NIV) 21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” 22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. 
Gen. 4:15, 24 (NIV) 15 But the LORD said to him, “Not so; anyone who kills Cain will suffer vengeance seven times over.” Then the LORD put a mark on Cain so that no one who found him would kill him.  24If Cain is avenged seven times, then Lamech seventy-seven times.”

WHAT IS THE BIG DEAL ABOUT FORGIVENESS?

To forgive as Jesus taught, we have to understand the unchangeable nature of God and His relationship with sin.
1. Love:God’s motivation for an unhindered relationship with us.
2. Holiness:is always offended by sin, hence the many references to His wrath.
3. Justice:must punish sin, He cannot tolerate it.
4. Forgiveness: what does this mean and where does it fit?
5. Sin: by analogy sin is a debt to be paid.
6. Grace: God’s love wants a relationship with us but because his holiness is offended and his justice requires that sin be punished, in order to forgive our sins, he sent his own son, Jesus, to pay the penalty for the debt that our sin procured.

Romans 3:23-25 (ESV) 23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, 24 and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, 25 whom God put forward as a propitiation by his blood, to be received by faith. This was to show God's righteousness, because in his divine forbearance he had passed over former sins. 26 It was to show his righteousness at the present time, so that he might be just and the justifier of the one who has faith in Jesus. 

SO, WHAT IS FORGIVENESS? WHEN WE FORGIVE SOMEONE, WHAT ARE WE ACTUALLY DOING? Is it simply saying to someone, “I forgive you”?

Question: Before coming to this topic, what did you think forgiveness meant? Discuss.

• Theological Definition: Forgiveness is releasing the person who has offended you from the obligation to pay the consequences for their sins against you. 
• It is the removal by the offended party, or by that party’s agent, of an offense from any further consideration. 
• The concept of forgiveness comes from the Old Testament understanding of redemption. Redemption comes from the root word “release, set free.” A ransom paid to redeem, purchase something or someone from their owner.
1. Slaves could be redeemed: set free from someone else’s possession.
2. Land could be redeemed: set free from someone else’s possession.
3. Forgiveness: set the offence or debt free from someone else’s possession.

Ephesians 1:7 (NIV) In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace. 

• Forgiveness removes the other person’s debt because it removes the offence from further consideration. It doesn’t cover their sins like the Old Testament concept of atonement: where the High Priest would go into the Holy of Holies once a year on the Day of Atonement (Yom Kippur) to sprinkle the blood of a perfect lamb on the lid of the ark of the covenant (mercy seat). When that was done, atonement was made, and their sins were “under the blood.” 
• Forgiveness after the cross, totally removes our sins. And if sin is gone because of forgiveness, then you cannot be judged, condemned and punished for it – ever. 
• And if you forgive someone else their sins against you, then you cannot hold it against them anymore, just like God won’t hold your sins against you. And you cannot bring them up again – except in rare discussions concerning the need to rebuild trust or for reconciliation. Reconciliation requires repentance. Forgiveness on our behalf does not.

Forgiveness releases people from the prison of their sin & from the prison of unforgiveness.

Discussion Questions: 

1. What are your thoughts on the biblical definition of forgiveness? 
2. When you have needed to forgive someone, have you totally released their debt to you from the heart?

WHAT IS THE FOUNDATION FOR FORGIVENESS RECEIVING AND GIVING?
The work of Jesus on the cross.

Colossians 2:13-15 (NIV) 13 When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins, 14 having canceled the charge of our legal indebtedness, which stood against us and condemned us; he has taken it away, nailing it to the cross. 15 And having disarmed the powers and authorities, he made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them by the cross. 

• The language of Paul refers to a commonly known handwritten document in the first century Greco-Roman world that, in this context, refers to a certificate of indebtedness, a legal receipt or a contract where debts were confessed or acknowledged, written down and signed by a debtor. Our names, sins, and the penalties for our sins were listed in such a document that God had.
• Our names, sins, and their penalties were recorded but Jesus cancelled them all on the cross and transferred our names into the Lambs Book of Life. Our names are no longer recorded on any list God has of people who have sinned.

Because our debt has been cancelled, we, as followers of Jesus, are required to cancel the debts of those who sin against us. If we want to be like Jesus, we must do as Jesus does!

AS DISCIPLES OF JESUS IN HIS KINGDOM, WE DO NOT HAVE THE OPTION NOT TO FORGIVE.

The unforgiving servant Matt 18:21-35 a parable about what Col 2:14-15 states.
After Jesus tells Peter he must forgives seventy-seven times:
• Servant 1 is called in to pay a debt of 10,000 talents (millions of dollars) but is forgiven.
• Servant 1 then goes and finds servant 2 who owes the first servant a hundred denarii (a few dollars) but doesn’t forgive him.
• When the king hears about this, he calls in Servant 1 and says:
‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33 Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ 34 In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. 35“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.” 

According to Jesus, refusing to forgive another after being forgiven is wickedness and will result in God reversing our forgiveness. This alone should put the fear of God into us. Again, if we need help that is okay. If we flat out refuse to forgive, that is not okay.

Many years ago, a lady who wouldn’t forgive her husband for shoplifting a small item 17 years prior, came to me for help; I thought. I thought she wanted help to forgive her husband, but she just wanted to justify her unforgiveness. She was bitter and twisted inside.
Compounded by a cultural background which placed a high value on reputation, and like in many countries, had a shame-based culture which swallowed her up entirely. She would not forgive her husband. I failed in my attempt to help her understand that as a follower of Jesus, she was required to forgive. She did not want to obey Jesus that day!

SHE WAS IMPRISONED BY HER OWN SIN OF UNFORGIVENESS.

TO FORGIVE IS A COMMAND THAT WE CANNOT BE IGNORE

Matthew 6:12-15 (NIV) And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. 13 And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from the evil one. 14 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

I once had a well-known worship leader from one of the largest churches in Australia, come to me to ask if I would mentor him. I didn’t think I could because I’m not that gifted musically but we discovered during a 3-hour conversation that when he led people in worship on the weekends, he saw on their faces a love for God he didn’t feel. As we discussed why this might be a problem, I discovered that he had unforgiveness towards his father who was a Pentecostal pastor but abused him and his two sisters, committed adultery with the church secretary and then divorced his mother and married that secretary; shattering the whole family.

I suggested to him that he needed to forgive his dad. He said, “I can’t.” I said, “Yeh, you can.” We went back and forth for a while so then I said, “You mean you won’t.” He paused and said, “Yes, I won’t.” I then said, "If you don’t forgive your dad his sins against you then God won’t forgive your sins.” He said, “That’s not fair.” I replied, “No, what’s not fair is that your sins put Jesus on the cross.” The truth of what Jesus said in Matthew 6:15 hit him hard but he took it. He began to weep for the first time ever and that evening chose to forgive his father.

Unlike the woman who was imprisoned by her own sin of unforgiveness, this man came imprisoned by his unforgiveness but was set free when he forgave his father. By his own testimony, that evening changed his life. Not because of me, but because he obey the teachings of Jesus.

IF WE HAVE RECEIVED FORGIVENESS, JESUS COMMANDS US TO GIVE IT
Luke 6:37-38 (NIV) 37 “Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven; 38 give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.”

Note the difference between the Sea of Galilee & the Dead Sea.
The Sea of Galilee, where Peter, James and John had their fishing business, is clean fresh water and is brimming with life: fish aplenty. Down stream via the Jordan River is the Dead Sea. There is no fish-life in the Dead Sea because it is full of salts and minerals: so much so, that it is said you cannot drown or sink because the minerals hold you up.

So, why is the Sea of Galilee full of fish and life and the Dead Sea is full of minerals and no life. Because there are rivers and streams flowing into the Sea of Galilee and the Jordan River and possibly other streams flowing out. But the Dead Sea has the Jordan River flowing into it but no rivers or streams flowing out so the water gets trapped and cannot reproduce in a healthy way. It just evaporates in the hot sun but nothing can live in it.

In the same way, we receive so much grace from God. And because we do, we are taught to also give it out. When we don’t we dry up and become unhealthy like the Dead Sea. We receive grace. We must give grace. We receive spiritual gifts. We must use them for others’ sake. We received material blessings. We must give our tithes and offerings. We receive forgiveness. We must give it to others when they sin against us.

Discussion Questions: 
1. Receiving forgiveness releases us from the prison of our sin. Have you found it difficult to receive forgiveness from God or other people? Discuss.
2. Forgiving others releases them from the prison of their sin while not forgiving others imprisons us in our own sin of unforgiveness. Have you found it difficult to forgive other people when they have sinned against you? Discuss.
3. What have your learned from this study that you can apply to your life and teach others about forgiveness as you disciple them?